Monthly Archives: May 2012

Infertility: This Man Talks Mothers Day

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Believe in your dreams

Many women will struggle this Sunday, Mothers Day. Some holidays make me bananas. I think Hallmark is behind most of the (off) holidays. Mothers Day, Fathers Day, Sweethearts Day, Valentines Day, Grandparents Day, Secretary Day, Talking Bass Day…..any holiday where a card can be bought furthers Hallmarks end and no one elses. As many of you know my wife and I battled the pain in the heart called infertility. We were lucky and had a good outcome after many years and tears. Some of you may stop reading here not wanting to hear from someone no longer in the trenches but trust me we are still in the trenches for you. When we went down infertility road I did not consider the first Mothers Day we had after a miscarriage.  It was a typical guy mistake to not think about that day having any bearing on her heart. It was not spite, it was not thinking. I think now, well sometimes.

Ladies I know I cannot take away any thoughts that may haunt you this weekend. Maybe you give the weekend no thought (I hope so). But if you do try to remember a few things. Remember you are not done on your journey so it is a day to remember your mother and your day will come. If you think the day will be tough make plans that will free you from dealing with it. Go to the movies with your husband or a comedy club. Keep things light. You MAY want to avoid dinners out if you think plethora of mommies and children may be bothersome and by the way it is normal for that to bother you. Plan a romantic evening in if you like. A staycation if you will.  It is never wrong to be selfish from time to time under these circumstances.

You are amazing. You are on a journey and Mothers day will pass. Women who take on this challenge are some of the strongest most resilient women I have met. You are heroes and you just don’t know it. There are mothers that would not make the sacrifices you make. You are the definition of selflessness. Remember it’s another day not Mothers day and screw Hallmark. I love you all and you are always in my thoughts.